An old farmer’s horse ran away, starts the ancient Chinese parable. “Such bad luck,” the neighbors said. The farmer felt the loss, and said only, “Maybe so.”
The next day it returned, leading a herd of wild horses. “What great luck!” the neighbors cheered. The farmer’s heart lifted. “Maybe so,” he said.
His son tried to ride one, was thrown, and broke his leg. “Terrible luck,” the neighbors murmured. The farmer ached for him. “Maybe so.”
The next week, officers came conscripting every able-bodied young man, and the son was passed over. “What good fortune!” the neighbors said. Relief washed through the farmer. Still he said, “Maybe so.”
The real leadership lesson? Respond fully, feel the loss, celebrate the win, take action as the moment demands, while holding steady enough to know that this, too, is just the next thing. Good or bad, it too shall pass.
Window Into “Maybe” in Real Life
Warren Buffett’s rejection from Harvard Business School, became his door to Columbia and Benjamin Graham, the mentor who made his career. Klarna’s AI chatbot, doing the work of 700 agents, led to rehiring humans a year later for the judgment the bot lacked, part of a shift Gartner says will reverse half of AI job cuts by 2027.
And the market: in late March 2026, with the U.S.–Iran conflict escalating, investors braced for the worst. A few months later, the S&P 500 had logged its best quarter since 2020, up nearly 15%. Bottom line: the stories had another chapter. And always will.
Call It – Just Don’t Carve It in Stone
In the parable, the farmer’s neighbors did nothing wrong. Naming a moment good or bad is very human and can be useful. What the farmer adds is the piece the neighbors leave out: the long view. He knows the moment is real. He also knows it isn’t the final word, so he won’t carve today’s verdict in stone.
That’s non-attachment – meeting the moment fully without clinging to it as the whole story. Practicing non-attachment grows your skills in emotional regulation too: you experience the win or the loss without letting it own you, so your next move comes from steadiness, not spike or spiral.
AMARE LEADERSHIP LAB — A ONE-OF-A-KIND GROUP FOR SPECIAL LEADERS
Staying steady when things get rollercoastery is a lot easier with people in your corner. The Amare Leadership Lab is a small-group experience for senior leaders who want more clarity and perspective, and less fear-driven reactivity. Come explore what it could do for you and your team, at
amareleadership.com/amare-leadership-lab .
Next Lab starts in September, spots are very limited!
Instant Thought Experiment
Bring to mind a win or loss you’re still carrying. Feel it fully, the sting or the glow. Then name three ways what happens next could surprise you.
So When Do You Ever Call It?
If it’s never done, when do you actually make final decisions? You decide constantly; you celebrate, fix, cut losses, on whatever timeline the work demands.
Non-attachment isn’t withholding judgment or freezing up. It’s refusing to marry the verdict: you act on today’s result while holding it loosely, ready to update as the story turns. The outcome informs you; it doesn’t get to own you.
Mirror: Two Questions to Reflect On
1. What “win” are you treating as written in stone?
2. What “loss” have you already filed as final; before the story finished?
Door Into Action: 3 Amare Leadership Steps to Practice Your “Maybe”
1. Practice your “maybe” pause. Train yourself to decouple your immediate reaction from long-term strategy with the pause. It keeps a verdict from hardening prematurely and anchors you in the long view.
2. Feel it fully, then take one real step. Sit in the win or loss for a minute, no spinning, no sealing. Then take the single next action it calls for, and let the rest stay open.
3. Take the long view on purpose. Before reacting, ask what the situation might look like in a year. Lead from there, not from today’s fear.
Amare Team Talk
Bring one question to your next team meeting: “What did we label a failure last year that turned out to matter in a way we didn’t expect?” Let the stories surface — they’ll recalibrate how the team meets the next setback.
The Best of Your Story May Be Unwritten
The farmer’s real gift is trusting that the story is still being written, and the courage to keep showing up for it. He feels the broken leg and the thrill of the wild horses fully, and clings to neither.
Lead the same way: fully present to this moment, fully open to the next, choosing love over fear when the outcome’s unknown.
Your hardest season may be the ground your best one grows from. So feel it all, cling to none of it, and stay present. Your best chapters are still to come.
Stay steady!
–Moshe
Acknowledgements: Deep gratitude to British philosopher/entertainer Alan Watts for his version of the ancient Taoist parable about the Chinese farmer.
Today’s Amare Wave Wednesday Quote
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.”
— Viktor Frankl, Holocaust survivor and author of Man’s Search for Meaning
Click here and read more Amare Wave Wednesday newsletters on related topics:
Time to Think: The Leadership Essential That’s Sacrificed Way Too Often
Millions of People Watched Lionel Messi Miss in the World Cup. What He Did Next May Change How You Lead.
The Great Irony: Get Better Results By Not Being Attached to Getting Them
AI May Be the Excuse for Layoffs When Leadership Is the Real Reason
Three Powerful Steps to Being Committed to Success – Without Being Attached to the Outcomes You Want
